Mom’s birthday is in four days. I am paralyzed. I just got out of graduate school and I should be looking for work, instead I am drinking, hanging out, having sex, basically doing anything I can to not feel the pain of her loss. But the pain is still there. It lingers.
I spoke to my brother today. It was a good conversation. He admitted to also just feeling like bawling and curling up into a ball. It seems like he is better adjusted than I am. I am hoping this feeling will process and that I will somehow move on and one day be happy or feel normal.
But today. I hurt.